Self-Esteem
Understanding Self‑Esteem
Self‑esteem shapes how you see yourself, how you relate to others, and how you move through the world. When self‑esteem is low, it can quietly influence decisions, relationships, boundaries, and opportunities—often without being recognized as the underlying issue.
Low self‑esteem is not about vanity or confidence alone. It often develops through early experiences, relationships, trauma, criticism, unmet emotional needs, or repeated messages about who you are supposed to be. Over time, these experiences can become internalized as harsh self‑judgment, self‑doubt, or a persistent sense of not being “enough.”
At Lodestone Psychology, self‑esteem therapy focuses on understanding where these beliefs came from and helping you develop a more stable, compassionate relationship with yourself.
How Low Self‑Esteem Can Show Up
Low self‑esteem can affect many areas of life. You may notice:
Persistent self‑criticism or negative self‑talk
Difficulty trusting your decisions
Fear of failure, rejection, or being judged
People‑pleasing or difficulty setting boundaries
Perfectionism or over‑functioning
Avoidance of opportunities or visibility
Feeling undeserving of care, success, or rest
Many people outwardly appear capable or successful while internally feeling insecure or inadequate.
The Emotional Impact of Self‑Esteem Struggles
Living with low self‑esteem can be exhausting. It often keeps people in a cycle of striving, comparing, or shrinking themselves to feel safe. Over time, this can contribute to anxiety, depression, burnout, relationship difficulties, and emotional disconnection.
Therapy offers a place to slow down these patterns and explore them with curiosity rather than judgment.
Where Self‑Esteem Beliefs Come From
Self‑esteem is shaped through lived experience. Influences may include:
Childhood or adolescent relationships
Critical or emotionally unavailable caregivers
Bullying, exclusion, or social rejection
Trauma or chronic stress
Cultural or societal expectations
Relationship patterns that reinforce self‑doubt
Understanding the origins of self‑esteem struggles helps reduce shame and opens space for change.
Our Therapeutic Approach
Self‑esteem therapy at Lodestone Psychology is relational, trauma‑informed, and practical. Therapy does not aim to replace self‑criticism with forced positivity. Instead, we help clients build self‑trust, self‑compassion, and emotional resilience.
Therapy may focus on:
Identifying and challenging internalized critical beliefs
Developing self‑compassion and self‑acceptance
Strengthening emotional regulation
Exploring boundaries and relational patterns
Rebuilding confidence through values‑based action
Integrating past experiences that shaped self‑worth
We draw from evidence‑based approaches including CBT, ACT, compassion‑focused therapy, and trauma‑informed care.
Self‑Esteem and Relationships
Low self‑esteem often shows up most strongly in relationships. Therapy can help you understand how self‑worth affects communication, boundaries, attachment, and vulnerability.
As self‑esteem becomes more stable, many clients notice improved relationships, clearer boundaries, and greater ease in expressing needs.
Self‑Esteem Therapy Summary
We support adults across Calgary and Alberta who are struggling with confidence, self‑worth, or self‑trust. Therapy is available in person and virtually, allowing flexibility and accessibility.
You deserve a relationship with yourself that feels supportive rather than critical. Therapy can help you build self‑esteem grounded in understanding, compassion, and confidence.
